Fear of success. This expression may sound contradictory. However, many of us fear success without even realizing it. Let me ask you a question. Is there something you want to have or want to happen but you feel anxious just by thinking it could actually happen? Is there something you normally think it would be a good thing if it would happen to you, but deep inside you’re afraid if that happens?
If yes, then you’re afraid of success. Success here doesn’t mean just money or career related topics. It means getting what you want. I’ll use a personal example, something that I used to think. I feel very good with myself and by myself. So I used to be afraid of starting a new relationship because I thought that it would mess up the good feeling I have. Even though I really wanted someone to share moments with me.
Basically, you want it, but you’re afraid. This happens for one reason only:
You are thinking about an outcome that you actually don’t want to happen. You think something unpleasant will happen if you get what you want.
So, why not change how you think about the outcome of that which you want to happen? In my example, I started visualizing a person which has the same values as myself. Someone who would enhance my connection with my inner self, who would inspire the best in me.
Root causes of the fear of success
Whatever you’re afraid of has to do with your perspective of that thing. It has to do with:
- how you see it
- what you relate to it
- how it makes you feel
You need to ask yourself: “How could I see this differently?”.
You may have arguments about how you see things the way you see them. Probably because of past experiences or because someone told you so, and you believed it. Let go of your arguments. Choose to start from scratch. Start from zero. Let new arguments come forth, without past experiences’ influences. Then choose the ones which empower you!
In the case of fear of success, create an outcome that makes you feel good. If the first outcome you imagine doesn’t do that, invent a new one. It’s all in your mind, it hasn’t happened yet. You have the control to imagine it as you would like to. Invent an outcome that will make you feel satisfied and that doesn’t make you afraid anymore. Something that excites you! Find the best case scenario for yourself.
Delete whatever you were thinking as an outcome before. Tell yourself that these thoughts do not fit you anymore, these thoughts do not fit the person you are becoming.
Practical way to overcome the fear of success:
1 – Pick one thing which you want to happen that has been making you feel anxious.
2 – Pay attention to how you think about the subject.
- How do you see it happening?
- What do you think might happen after you achieve it?
You’ll realize that you’re not relating just positive things to that which you want.
3 – Write down the negative things you have observed. Now, I want you to read it for yourself. Did any of these have happened yet? Who wrote these? You did! Can you write something else, a different outcome? Of course!
4 – Think about all the positive things that could happen once you achieve success — based on your own concept of positive (let go of the “common sense”). Write them down in another piece of paper.
5 – Get the list of the negative things and rip it, or burn it… Whatever you do, make sure you physically destroy it.
6 – Now, every time you think about this thing you want, visualize / imagine / rejoice all the positive results it may bring to you. If you catch yourself thinking of any of those negative possibilities, remember that you are the one in charge here! This is something YOU CAN CONTROL!
I wish you all the success in the world!
Share with us your success story in the comment session below and tell us how you have overcome your fears.
Lots of love,